Alpenglow

One of my favorite views in the world involves the snow. It comes after the fluffy snow clusters fall from the gray sky, but before anyone can trample through it. The blanket of white is smooth, pure, and untouched by anything and everything. In fact, it is what I look at now. The sun, light orange in color and soft, brushes across the surface of the crystal ground. The forest beyond draws a harsh light between the untainted field and the chaotic habitat of hundreds of animals; it is where life goes on. The sun begins to fade behind the mountains of my home.

It’s getting later now, and I can’t find it in me to proceed through the field and into the forest. Even I, young and naive myself, have the potential to ruin this image of perfection before me. I stand, my eyes glued to the path I must break through. I suppose I could stay here and never have to enter that world. It’s impossible to go back to where I was before now, but I must continue somehow. Otherwise, I will be left, alone, in the darkness. The field is endless in a horizontal manner. There is no going back, and there is no going around. My two options are to proceed straight through or give up.

The forest looms, dark and haunting like the gaping mouth of a wolf that waits for its prey to make a wrong move. What awaits me in the forest is uncertain. Misfortune or fortune? Misery and fear or benevolence and hope?

The world, however, pays no mind to my indecision. No matter what I choose, the world will go on as it is expected to. My world, however, will be completely different beyond the dense wall of trees ahead of me. The birds fly overhead, entering the forest as if no misfortune could possibly be waiting for them. It seems as if I am the only one hesitating. The others make it seem so easy, like it’s all just instinct. Is it not instinct to hesitate like so?

I look back at the snow once again, the glow of the sun disappearing all too quickly. I have to choose now. Despite everything being so uncertain, so unstable, so terrifying, and so easily tainted, I take a step forward. The snow crunches under my boots as they sink through the blanket. The further I go, the more I see of the dark forest. I see the robins in the branches of the newly budding trees and the deer teaching their young where to find food. I see the beauty and potential of the forest I once found so dreadful.

The sun is gone now without so much as a tearful farewell; I’m on my own now.

I don’t look back.

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