“Break Ups are Always a Gift,” Relationship Coach Lindsey Ellison Visits FSU

Lindsey Ellison, relationship coach and author of the book “Magic Words: How to Get What You Want from a Narcissist” visited Frostburg State University on Wednesday, Oct. 9, 2019. Ellison first visited with student leaders in a small reception from 5-6:30 p.m., and subsequently followed the reception with a presentation open to all students, faculty, staff, and community members at 7 p.m. 

Ellison began her career as a relationship coach for adults around the ages of 35-65 after trial and error with relationships, which she coined as “life rafts.” She spoke of four different men she had encountered in her life and told her audience of the lessons she learned from each of these male individuals.

Following ten years of marriage with one of the men she spoke about during her presentation, and, ultimately, 17 whole years of their relationship, Ellison says that she knew she needed to leave the relationship; she did not know why, but did know that it was in her best interest to get out of there, and to get out of there fast. She says that throughout their entire relationship, she had felt as though something was very off, but she never was able to figure out what exactly it was. It was at the age of 35, with two young boys, that Lindsey Ellison decided to leave her husband after almost two decades together, and brought her one step closer to present-day Lindsey. 

Open with students about the steps that followed the separation and subsequent divorce from her then-husband, Ellison says she began going to a therapist, not only to get the help that she needed but also to allow someone from outside her inner circle to evaluate where it all went wrong. It was after the first session with her therapist that Lindsey was pointed towards the path of narcissism as a cause for her and her husband’s relationship crumbling.

Minutes upon hours upon days and weeks of researching, Ellison came to the conclusion, with the help of other professionals, that her husband was a narcissist, and she had made the right decision in leaving him when she could.

She pointed out many of the red flags and warning signs of codependency and narcissism, including direct examples from each of the men she had encountered and spent much of her life with. 

At the end of her presentation, Ellison delivered some closing remarks, including music she played with tips for each and everyone to follow. Among these tips were “focus on you,” communicate,” and “trust your gut.” Finally, Lindsey gave out her contact information, as well as her social media information.

With questions to go through direct message, please find Lindsey on Instagram at @lindsey_ellison, and listen to her podcast entitled “Unbreakable You: Breakup Without Being Broken.”