My Poetry Adventure
I have spent a lot of my time at Frostburg State (the 3 semesters I have been here), trying to figure out what I wanted to do. At first, I was going to become a vet. I loved animals and I wanted to be of help to them, so I figured that was the best way to do it. I started as Wildlife and Fisheries then moved to Health Science, where I was actually supposed to be. Now, before COVID hit and we shut down last spring, I felt out of place in the science department. Not for any other reason than I felt as if I wasn’t cut out for it. However, I stayed and when May came around, I realized that I just wasn’t cut out for it, and that it was okay to feel like that. Being someone who doesn’t like not knowing though, I hated having to admit that I didn’t like my major, but I had no clue what I wanted to do. I did this anyway though because I could not register for another semester of science classes I knew I would A) fail, and B) didn’t need it. So I bit the bullet and called my advisor who was incredibly nice about it and worked with me!
So, instead of the science classes, we agreed on, I threw that out the window and looked at classes that interested me. It was like grabbing books off of a shelf that I had no knowledge about but felt inclined in that direction. I registered for theater, calculus, some other classes that I can’t even remember now, and poetry. I felt so uncomfortable taking classes that just interested me because I didn’t know what I wanted to do. Then, I did some self-digging, and realized I really wanted to do something in policing or law, and that I wanted to add history because it was fun. So now, I am a Law and Society and History major. However, this is not the point of this story. So, now that I had chosen my newly found majors, I had to register for those classes, however, I kept poetry. I didn’t know why, but it felt right.
So, I entered this class with no knowledge of poetry or how it worked besides the mini-chapter we do about Shakespeare and sonnets during high school. I guess, in a sort of lucky way, I was going through some things, so it gave me something to write about because I was feeling intense feelings. This got in the way sometimes though, because I was scared to delve into what I was feeling, so some of my poetry fell really flat in some parts. As I’ve continued this class, I still fall into these pit-falls, and my poetry is nowhere near good really, but my professor never speaks ill of our attempts but builds up the criticism in a way to show that you can grow and be better.
Not that I have met many poets, but Professor LaFemina is one who cares so much about teaching poetry and helping students find their poetic style (the style in which one writes poetry) and build it to be better than it was when it began. He also lent us poetry books to read and find new poets we enjoy. I, personally, have found new poets that I will grab books by if I see them. He wants students to learn and grow in their own way, which is something that I have learned is incredibly important when writing poetry. Everyone has their own style. Me? I like to write about what I’m feeling and how it fits into my life. When I write things that are just to write them, I find they’re not even close to as good as the ones I write when I feel something strongly. It doesn’t even have to be a negative emotion, my positive emotions have come out and made alright poems.
I think the big takeaway here that I want to emphasize is that not all of your classes have to be a part of the major you’re in. You can take classes that are way outside that you enjoy. If you enjoy art and painting or sculpting, try taking an art class. Or maybe you’ve always wanted to be better at photography, take a photography class. Talk with your advisors and they should understand that sometimes you need a class that breaks away from your major so you don’t get bored. And this doesn’t mean you have to become an art major or that you love what you’re doing any less, it just means that you need one class that breaks away from your norm. That’s what college is all about right? Exploring your different loves in order to find a job that you will enjoy for the rest of your life. I don’t know who said it, but a quote I hear often is “If you do what you love, you’ll never work a day in your life” and I think more people need to think like that sometimes. Keep your hobbies and fun days, they’re what will get you through the rough times at the place you get paid.
One poet I found through this class is Sharon Olds. I was loaned her book “The Dead and The Living” and out of this book of poems, this one really captured my eye:
The Eye
My bad grandfather wouldn’t feed us.
He turned the lights out when we tried to read.
He sat alone in the invisible room
in front of the hearth, and drank. He died
when I was seen, and Grandma had never once
taken anyone’s side against him,
the firelight on his red cold face
reflecting extra on his glass eye.
Today I thought about that glass eye,
and how at night in the big double bed
he slept facing his wife, and how the limp
hole, where is eye had been, was open
towards her on the pillow, and how I am one-fourth him, a brutal man with a
hole for an eye, and one-fourth her,
a woman who protected no one. I am their
sex, too, their son, their bed, and
under their bed the trap-door to the
cellar, with its barrels of fresh apples, and
somewhere in me too is the path
down to the creek gleaming in the dark, a
way out of there.
The Author
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